‘fake alarm, but what the f*, if it is in the mind, it is there, somewhere…!’, so he murmured, cursing himself at least 14th time in the day, the rest 10 hours were missed due to his sleep. “those 10 hours of bliss are the most coveted…” or something like that his father used to tell him. he tried recollecting the exact sentence, and just ended up with ’my memory, what the…’, and cursing for the 15th time…
the more he thought, the more the fake alarms rang in his mind driving him crazy, it was a vicious circle. the 10 empty cups of coffee on his desk became the 10 heads of a famous mythological hero, or was that a defamed villain from contemporary cinema…
he tried once again to keep his eyes open, trying to finish the business at hand, a presentation to the management on “flexi timing policy: empowering employees”. ‘empowering? well, i could use some,er, a lot of it…O LOrd! empower me to obliterate those who think of such presentations’, he pleaded.
whatever it may be, but that presentation and many more such tasks were putting the fuel in his car, food in his stomach, and dirty ideas in his mind. he could not help smiling at the last thought: “dirty ideas”, such as keeping a vault next to the seat of all the employees, who are made to work in “flexi timings”. beyond the stipulated 8 hours, the vault would open up, and then….the employee would get sucked up in the vault and reach a wall with 2 gates. one of them would lead to the loo and the second to yet another loo… inside both the toilets, there would be big LCD TVs with remote controls: wouldn’t it be better to just work instead of getting bugged here?”. The remote would have only one button: “I agree to work on my own will, let me go back to my seat.”
but the travesty is that such dirty ideas remain only that – dirty ideas. Because it takes a lot more than dirty imagination to convert dirty ideas to dirtier outcomes.
he got up to get himself the last cup of espresso for the day, hoping to wrap up the presentation without any more dirty diversions….But tragedy had him, as you sow, so you reap and thus……his dirty ideas lead him to the pantry. for the first time in the day, his eyes got locked on the bowl of sugar. sugar, sugar everywhere but not a speck for him. in a flash of a second, he picked up the bowl of sugar, started running towards the main door shouting, “i am a theaf, i am stealing company’s sugar, fire me…”
the next day he was awarded the star employee in the “health improvement week”, for trying to remove fat-building sugar from the premises. before he could realize that he should have shouted in English and not in Gujarati, he was awarded with another presentation assignment… “boosting awareness through symbolic gestures”.
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