Revolutionary Evolution

Biology is as mean as a subject can ever get. And Evolution is at the forefront leading the assault. It reminds those MCP that unlike the popular notion of their being descendant of Adam, they have all come from Ardi (Link), a female. If some skeptic MCP were to contest the latest discovery, there is another 20-year-old discovery saying that before Ardi there was a Lucy (Link), yet another female.

It also shuts up people who love to talk about the inferior darker race, by showing that you have all evolved from a single being, definitely not a chameleon like, who would have selectively given them fairer inheritance leaving others with a dark color.

But above all, it hurt Sakshi a lot the other day. She felt very low in the morning the moment she read that unlike her earlier belief, humans have not evolved from the ancestors of a modern day chimpanzee.   It was very difficult for her to find a yet another nickname for me, the latest being “chimpu”, for my chimp like behaviour.

So to divert her mood (very important in the morning, because the food available in the dinner is surely a direct descendant of her mood in the morning when she does most of her cooking), we started talking about how fake all these things are.

“Before you knew that I had come from a monkey, did you not believe that all human beings have come from a wise man Adam and a foolish woman Eve (who ate the fruit)?” I asked her. “Well, I believe that the story was written by another MCP like you to depict women as fools. She may have eaten the fruit, but was a lot smarter than Adam. If you really want to know the story, read the diaries of Adam (Link) and Eve (Link) written by another man, not an MCP, Mark Twain”, she replied.

Seeing no green shoots of  improvement in mood,  I took a big risk: “See evolution is such a slow thing. For example, by the time the dinosaurs started realizing that there was a bug in the backside, the bug had already come in front of their eyes travelling the entire food channel. Then why to bother so much about it? The time you will take to identify another peculiar, animal like habit of mine will be much lesser. For now let’s settle for chimpu. Besides, any words coming from you, except words like shopping, holidaying, etc., are pure pleasure to me.”

And before she could analyze the long sentence I had just blurted out, I said: “If evolution were to run fast, working women like you would have surely developed a third arm to wrap up cooking quickly before rushing to the office for work.”

Sakshi got distracted with the idea of having a third arm, and as expected, carried on cooking thinking about how the third arm would help her. Anyhow, the food in the evening was delicious.

As I stretched in the bed to sleep that night, I had a BB thought (typically my style). If evolution were a fast process, many husbands would have grown either crocodile skins or tortoise shell on their bums as a protection from being beaten by a handheld device called a stick by their beloved wife.

Well, those husbands reading this a million years ago, if you already have some protection there, please don’t forget that we were the ones who made it possible for you.